Kid’s whine turns into another grape pun

Posted In humor by Haltse Monday December 31, 2007

To our toddler when shopping at Bev Mo(Drink supermarket for non US types) in the wine section.

one day you’ll    turn from something  smellier to  a sommelier,

It’s nearly 2008. For the Catholic church that means 8 minute past 8 in the 15C

Posted In Demon Haunted World,pat by Haltse Sunday December 30, 2007

His poopiness the hole has decided to take on the  forces of darkness and evil.   Excellent! Not only will he be doing good and valuable work but he’s doing so in an environmentally sound manner.

After all he won’t have to travel too far to get started. 

 A phrase comes to mind about a fox guarding the chickens but I’m sure that’s unfair and suggests that  people that have been proven in court to expose children to known abuse and that allowed those accused sanctuary  would not be the best people to root out evil.  And why?  because G_d tells them to.  I am glad that I don’t need a book to tell me that abusing children is wrong but for those that need help I suppose a large hat, a dress and a ratlike countenance ( ad Popium attack) is just the kind of motivation needed.

Pope’s exorcist squads will wage war on Satan | the Daily Mail

Vatican chiefs are concerned at what they see as an increased interest in the occult.

They have introduced courses for priests to combat what they call the most extreme form of “Godlessness.”

Believer bitter over ‘prosperity’ preachings – The book of "nut" Job :)

Posted In Demon Haunted World,media,pat by Haltse Thursday December 27, 2007

I really don’t get this level of mental illness being seen as normal. Let’s get this straight.  You have ever lasting life, you never die yet that’s not enough?  Jesus -, no really. The only thing funnier is the State that runs the lottery is investigating those preying on the less fortunate’s desperation.

Only the blessings didn’t come. Fleenor ended up borrowing money from friends and payday loan companies just to buy groceries. At first she believed the explanation given on television: Her faith wasn’t strong enough.

“I wanted to believe God wanted to do something great with me like he was doing with them,” she said. “I’m angry and bitter about it.

Believer bitter over ‘prosperity’ preachings – CNN.com

in a jiffy. Jiffy Lube screw up an oil change

Posted In Arizona,Bad CS,General,reality by Haltse Thursday December 27, 2007

There’s more to come on this since Jiffy Lube are basically contending they are not culpable. A lot more but I’m sick of paying tradesmen and services money for substandard and in this case negligent work that has incurred me other charges. 1″ over fill on the oil, thanks.

Even more fun is the People at Midas that get their very own special level of hell for attempted fraud. Oh wait they actually carried out fraud too by charging for an oil-filter that was under 1 day old, claiming the wipers are cracked ( nice try new 3 weeks ago) and a few other things I’ll get to. For now It’s time to suggest that you don’t get an oil change from the Jiffy Lube at 27th 2745 W Peoria Ave Phoenix.

On your Sweeney Todd. Uk slang meets Ameri.. can. Sweeney’s self defence. Think of it as T for Toddeta

Posted In Culture-internet,media,political,rants,state gone wild,You have nothing to fear by Haltse Monday December 24, 2007

The Sweeney Todd aka flying squad   in the UK were an “elite”   police unit designed to address the most serious, at least serious to people that like money and property, crimes. It’s a fitting name given the corruption at the core of Sweeney Todd is the apparutus of crime and punishment.

Out of the terrible tale of Sweeney Todd comes a question that  seemed to  I’m assumming you know the basics of the story , and did so prior to the recent movie, but there’s quite a few versions of the tale that predates the musical and movie.   Todd in this incarnation is set up and sent to Australia  by the corrupt judge and the local enforcers for the crime of marrying a woman that the judge has the hots for.  This is the part I have to stress the seriousness of.

Having just read a book about the  British system of transportation to Australia , the Fatal Shore by Robert Hughes, you need to appreciate that this wasn’t just a  playful gambit by the judge in a game of romantic one upsmanship. If Barker( Todd prior to name change) was to survive at all it would be after a journey that the majority did not survive on the earliest boats, to be  worked to death , flogged,  fed rotten food when there was any.      To then have Pirelli  threaten to unmask him to those people was a  very real and present threat to his life and livliehood which he dealt with by what most in the audience, judging by their laughter at the mititagion of this act as being  akin to ” he was blackmailing me”, ” Oh well, then that’s different”

At this point I think there’s a strong case for his actions that I would defend in polite company.   Then , then there’s the rest of story. This is very much  in the style of Chris Rock’s OJ riff.  “i’m not saying he should have killed her but.. I understand”

I’m coming around to the idea that it’s not the police, the judges or even the politicians to blame but those that support them.  I’m taking Sam Harris’s  theory that the religious mild are the largest danger to our evolution being that the give a framework for the truly commited to operate in.  It’s the same with the state.  There’s no way clowns like the Judge could get away with this if the population didn’t want it to occur. We have our own clowns here in Arizona  but the population just like to think that something’s being done.    So when Todd gets all pie eyed at revenge on a world that he see as sanctioning the horrors that befell him  how much truth is there in that?  Like I said  I’m not saying he should have done it but I understand.

If dildos are illegal in Texas whose making these laws?

Posted In rants,state gone wild by Haltse Saturday December 22, 2007

So the way to protect those on the margins of society , ok at least “polite” society is to reduce their earnings.     Then again this is the state that  repays the veterans of Foreign wars with  a raid  on poker night.  It doesn’t look like one has to mess with Texas they’re already messed up.

Texas Slaps ‘Pole Tax’ On Strip Joints – San Antonio News Story – KSAT San Antonio

In what some have dubbed the “pole tax,” the Lone Star State will require its 150 or so strip clubs to collect a $5-per-customer levy, with most of the proceeds going to help rape victims. The tax goes into effect on New Year’s Day.

AZ MVD The colder it gets the longer the Queues

Posted In rants,state gone wild by Haltse Saturday December 15, 2007

I am fed up with going to the DMV/ MVD etc.  This morning I wandered over to one of the two in Phoenix open at the weekend only to be met with a long tail out of the building.   Result  no registration for me. Looks like Monday  AM  wait instead.

funny pictures
Caturday at the DMV « Lolcats ‘n’ Funny Pictures – I Can Has Cheezburger?
 

You’re McFuckin’ kidding me? Surely this is taking the McPiss . UK MacDonalds take on their customers.

Posted In Bad CS,Culture-internet,humor by Haltse Friday December 14, 2007

 This is one of those tales I love.   Most people here don’t believe me when I said that the UK was so hostile to car drivers that just being able to find somewhere to drive it and park was a chore.  Pay the toll to get over the bridge, pay the toll to get into the city, pay to park   etc.  Now it looks like McDonald’s in the UK have decided that it’s in their interests to send $150 fines to people who have the gall(  they probably have that minced up in their  happymeal ) to eat their and pay for the meal.  The UK people don’t seem to be  ba da da da daaaa loving it.  So that’s funny.  What’s funnier and I have this debate  quite a lot is that just because you hire a third person to be a dick on your behalf doesn’t make you  less  culpable just highlights how  crass you are.  Hey  customers we’ve paid a company to shit in your food but since we don’t profit from it, swallow ok?      See how it goes.   Eat lunch one day,  get fined,  refuse to pay get a larger fine, then  they take you by force and it all goes pear shaped.   If you need to commit a crime in the UK  mug someone . You’ll get less of a fine, some assistance with education, rented accommodation and some money  .. just don’t park while beating the shit out of the pensioner. 

McParking row as slow eaters given heavy fines | The Guardian | Guardian Unlimited

McDonald’s in effect washed its hands of the charge, saying it had been imposed by Civil Enforcement and the burger giant did not profit from it.

just junk on freedom and the like. It’s like a bar rant with myself.

Posted In political,rants,reality,Sites of interest,Social Media,state gone wild by Haltse Wednesday December 12, 2007

 This is an argument I usually lose and most because the other side wishes to resort to violence.  I wish I had the insight to tie my experience with how the Scots act based on their institutions and beliefs  versus what I understand the American ones to be since  I don’t fit into either of them. 

 Sure there are quite a few touching points but  I’m arguably able to cope in both societies and have been fortunate enough to  secure work  , mostly interesting work, since I was  16, remain solvent and have evaded the law for any but the minor transgressions, that are impossible to avoid.

Yet I hold views contrary to the masses of both countries re their national myths of identity and character and where that intersects with reality. Does beating up the English and burning their holiday homes doesn’t make you more Scottish , or does it but in an entirely different light? Same way with the Americans who appear to be fixated by freedom won by the restriction of others and does that make you more American?  Seemingly yes. 

Which reminds me there’s a  radio show in Phoenix called “Ridin Dirty” on KFNX which today advocated ignition interlocks for all cars as a solution to  DUI,  not as a joke  but as a default behavior of all new cars.  It’s an interesting idea but  socializing the cost of this crime makes as much sense as a tax on kitchen knives to pay for domestic violence … then again how many taxes really make sense?
 
Why not have cars locked to speed by their location as reported by a mandatory onstar gps?  Disable cars  when their insurance runs out,  when the reg tag expires or hell  only allow you to drive between home and the DMV when your papers aren’t in order.  All are readily done with today’s tech.. do we want to?     How about health plans that give you a credit card hooked up to your real time vitals?  Sorry today the card doesn’t work at BK but..  you can  get a Sub, no cheese 6″ max.  Sweet tooth replaced by  a blue one. There’s no end to this “freedom” 

The freedom to laugh is about the best I can do.

Anytime you tell me the people are too stupid to manage their own affairs I have to sadly agree with you.   My solution is to leave them alone. Yours is to rely on those same people to tell us what to do. 

 And I’m the crazy one?  

  

Putting my reader’s goodwill in Jeopardy. I’ll take repetition for$23

Posted In Culture-internet,Erin,humor,Media mayhem by Haltse Wednesday December 12, 2007

 Iz affy  crew ell  this but He’s nae  Scottish, ergo crap an aws fair in love an wahr:)

trebeck2.gif

Ms Erin over at  otterpupdesigns.com knocked this one out.

Oh noes, I can’t stop myself from perpetuating a meme

Posted In Culture-internet,Family,humor by Haltse Tuesday December 11, 2007

Oddly enough this is my first submission to a site and I know there’s a better caption there but I am not able to reach it presently.

funny pictures

moar funny pictures

Ah’ll take OTC medicines that you need for $400

Posted In General,humor,media by Haltse Tuesday December 11, 2007

The Question is

“Things I need to avoid a heart attack”

trebek

 Wot  ish  ashprin ye gaping  eejit 

 SNL-Connery

“ye fell on yer arsh Trebek.”

Alex Trebek has heart attack – CNN.com

That’s the one thing I love about the holiday season. Loads of Parties were people just can’t take “don’t go there” for an answer

Posted In Culture-internet,political,Sites of interest by Haltse Friday December 7, 2007

I am kind lucky that I fell through the idea that libertarianism , as practiced by most of the people I’ve met here is going to advance us anywhere, soon, ever.

Now I can’t make such an unsupported statement ( ok I can but.. ) Stefan Molyneux , another great reason to embrace new media, takes a look at the demands that libertarians make from the rest of the world and what they will offer the rest of the world in return. It’s quite enlightening. While many of his techniques if followed through to their logical conclusion will save you a fortune on xmas cards ,being that you will have no friends left, they are rather interesting. So if you think that another person can give you freedom then you may as well vote for , well anyone really it doesn’t matter. Now I’m off to read
Freedomain Radio – Videos

Park life. No Rhyme , though there’s reasons to Phoenix council’s stanza on the arts ( no poets in the park without papers and plastic)

Posted In political,rants,state gone wild,You have nothing to fear by Haltse Thursday December 6, 2007

There’s a book by Robert Anton Wilson that has  a progression of signs  from the reasonable “keep of the grass”  to the ultimate goal of “no public in the park” Phoenix parks department must have read such.  This place is a cultural  fucking desert to begin with and  while I used to attend slams, and enjoy them,  would I pay ( other than donate to the prize fund for the poets) or show an ID just to stand in a public park paid for with my taxes, to hear other tax payers speak?

  Ok, I know,  poets =taxpayers  hardly seems plausible but  most of the really good ones  had jobs and experience in the world that beat out the whinier beautiful and unique snowflakes  that build their entire relevance solely on their internal world. 

 K tnx bai,  I am not sure that understanding you better on most days helps me understand  the world, people or myself better since I lack the prerequisite lack of self esteem ( or luck, funds and opportunity),  to have fucked 5 people in a night to clear up a creative log jam that you have to bring to a wider audiences attention. Regardless if nearly every gather we as citizens of this town has to have a permission slip , an admission fee and a catering staff   let’s make a deal.  Stop  fucking charging  taxes to fund these parks and turn it 100% over to user fees.  Removing “public, they should say shit owned by the government” space   as a venue for the public to gather seems highly odd.So odd that we should all attend their meetings which  seems to be the last real venue of performance art in the City.

 

Phoenix – News – Poetry, Slammed

But last week, Poetry in the Park said goodbye to Encanto Park. City bureaucrats had told the event’s sponsors that they needed to become an official city-sponsored event and start charging admission, which, naturally, the city would collect. The city even dictated the price: $3 a head. If the group refused, city staffers said, it would have to start paying rent — to the tune of $100 a month. Not surprisingly, the poets are saying goodbye instead.

another funny one where the majority pull out their need to be persecuted.

Posted In pat,rants,reality by Haltse Tuesday December 4, 2007

 
It’s odd the kids came out as atheists until some one tells them they are  full of sin and will likely go to hell for just being born. Yet I’m not seeing those protests. 😀

Is ‘Golden Compass’ ‘selling atheism to kids’? – CNN.com

 

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